In a time when we often find ourselves divided instead of united,

Be reminded, there is only one force that overcomes fear and hate,

LOVE makes US great!

Welcome to the eleventh month of LOVE makes US great! This blog follows a monthly formula. Third week – bringing more love to our workplaces. Let’s start loving.

With more than three decades of human resources work behind me, I often reflect on what I would have done differently in those early years given what I now know about fairness, inclusion, and bias. There is one process in particular that I would revamp first.

If you are working in a company, odds are, you have an email in your inbox right now about performance reviews. You may be writing a self-evaluation, sharing feedback about a colleague, drafting evaluations for those you lead, or all of the above.

We’d all like to believe that we evaluate everyone accurately and fairly. Research demonstrates otherwise. Today, I'll focus on gender. 

The unfortunate reality is that women and men are often described and rated differently for the same behavior. I'll never forget being told that I was viewed as not being career advancement-oriented. This was during a conversation I initiated with an executive to discuss career growth opportunities for me. Well, at least I wasn’t told that I was being too “career aggressive," which often happens when women express their career aspirations. 

The assertive vs. aggressive descriptor is a gender classic. For the same behavior, men are described as assertive while women are described as aggressive, pushy, or my personal ill-favored phrase, “having sharp elbows.”

It's also an unfortunate reality that women receive less behavior-specific and actionable feedback. She is told she needs to be less aggressive, full stop. He is told he should continue to assertively state his opinion and the supporting facts. She asks for an example and is told that quite a few people gave this feedback. He is told about a recent meeting where attendees were swayed by his conviction, but he could also stop to listen more to others.

Early on in my HR career, I was unaware of these dynamics, and I didn't even notice it happening, even if it happened to me, which, in hindsight, it did. 

When you know, you can change. Now I work with clients to build consistency and accountability into the performance process. It’s actually very simple, try it out this year. 

Fair and fearless feedback starts with defining the criteria for success back in the goal-setting process, sharing reminders about how bias creeps into evaluations before folks start writing, gathering input from multiple sources, checking that there are descriptions of behavior and the language used is consistent with the behavior described, and auditing for consistency with the ratings assigned.

Taking the time to ensure Fair and Fearless Feedback to support others' success is love in action.

Love requires participation. 

Love requires sharing. 

Love requires action. 

Love requires commitment. 

With gratitude,

Joyce Aiko

(Yes, love really is my middle name.)